The Broom: A Metaphorical Band-Aid

Well it's now safe to say that my depression has been alleviated thanks to the Mets sweeping the A's. This isn't to say that the team is now out of this slump that has been the month of June, but things are definitley looking up. The Mets outscored the A's 20-3 this series, completely dominating every aspect of the game, as well as releasing the secret weapon Saturday night: The Paul Lo Duca time bomb. After home-plate umpire Marvin Hudson called a low inside strike on Lo Duca, Paulie went Walnuts and started barking like one of Mike Vick's dogs repeating the phrase "You're not gonna like me when I'm angry!". After things seemed to have settled down Hudson threw Lo Duca out of the game as he stepped back into the box. This marked the return of Captain Red Ass. Throwing his bat and helmet onto the field, he stormed off in a rage followed by a Yard Sale which consisted of Lo Duca's chest protector, elbow guard, and knee pads. The bat boy bought everything.

Paul Lo Duca aka the Hulk aka Paulie Walnuts aka...

My take on the explosion: It was all planned out. The Mets had been flatter than soda from the back of the fridge all night long, and Lo Duca felt he needed to do something to wake the team up. He has been the most vocal about the lack of fire shown during games this season when being interviewed, and it seems like this is something he would do to motivate the team. That's my take. Lo Duca's take: "Good Italian temper in me." -- Lo Duca. Ok, so thanks to that quote, add a new nickname to the list for Dukie: Paulie Walnuts. Dukie has those crazy eyes that Paulie Walnuts from the Sopranos has, and they both have the temper of an ill-blooded Brooklynite. You don't mess with Brooklyn... we're pretty much a big deal. Add that to the fact they're both Italian blooded and sleep with girls a lot younger than them and they're practically the same person.

Paul Lo Duca: Version AARP

It was nice to see the bullpen pitch well also, which has been a rare occurance up to this point in the season. Everything seemed to be clicking on all cylinders unlike any game that had been played the previous three weeks. Lets just call this series a fresh of breath air after sitting in a pre-Inside Smoking law bar in New York City in which Leo Dicaprio's character from Blood Diamond was there meeting with every movie star from the 1920's to the 1980's. It was much needed to say the least. Only half the battle has been won though, with the Mets currently at 4-2 on the home-stand, as a fan you would like to see them go at least 7-3. This would mean we would have to take 3/4 from the Cardinals which is entirely possible seeing as the Cardinals have gotten worse than their fluke of a season last year if that is even possible. Seriously, an 83 win team winning the World Series?

Looking at St. Louis' starters they have Mike Maroth on Monday, Todd Wellemayer on Tuesday, Anthony Reyes who is 0-9 on Wednesday, and Adam Freakin' Wainwright on Thursday. We have everyone but Maine pitching for us in this series. Everyone would agree that we have the edge in every pitching matchup this series, except for Tim McCarver and Joe Buck whose opinions don't count because if I wanted an opinion from an incompetent hack I would ask Scott Schoenweis. ( Just kidding, I dont condone the opinion's of any kinds of hacks, especially incompetents.) And there is no denying that with Jim Edmonds and David Eckstein out of the Cardinals line-up the Mets have the offensive edge. I would love nothing more than to sweep them and go up 7-0 on the Cards in the season series. I also want to knock Adam Wainwright out of the game within 2 innings on Thursday and Carlos Beltran should feel the same way. The Cardinals coming to town is the perfect chance at revenge once again for the Mets, and if that doesn't motivate this team to buckle down and dominate a team I don't know what would.

painful memories due to Wainwright, the Mets will face him Thurdsday

Maybe we're starting to get a little hot, maybe this series was a fluke. But with the Cardinals coming to town for a four game series get ready to really see what this New York team is made of. This is a series the Mets should take 3 out of 4 in. Not have to, not need to, not possibly can, but they SHOULD take 3 out of 4 or else start sounding the alarms. Go get your tickets for this series now Mets fans, we need to back this team to the extent that the Entourage crew back's up Vince. And if you watched Entourage's Sunday night episode, it's safe to say Billy Walsh is becoming Paulie "Walnuts" LoDuca, and I'm not sure how much more of this show I can take. Start up the Ari Gold spinoff and wake me up when that happens because Jeremy Piven is the only actor who can actually... act on that show. Whatever, i'm still gonna watch it.

I will also be watching the Mets game at Shea this Tuesday night to see Ollie Perez in action. Cardinals fans, you've been warned.